CuZ i Am DuE FoR a MiRaCLe, i'M wAiTiNg FoR a SiGn, iLL StArE StRaiGHt iNtO ThE

Tue, 02 Mar 2004 03:54:38 GMT

</font>

Sun, 29 Feb 2004 07:25:50 GMT

hey everyone i have a new username!!!! myxapology!!! everyone add me! and ill add u back.... plus can someone show me how to make a lj friends only!?!?!? thanks

bout time i updated

Thu, 26 Feb 2004 04:19:58 GMT

OOOOOMMMMGGG!!! Does anyone know who MadCap is?!?!?! That song lovesick is soooo dame cute and sweet i love it!!!!! LoL!!!

YaY ALex came back....

I love your guitar stace.. its soo sexsay!!!!!!! I miss you heather!!!!!

HeY!!!

Wed, 18 Feb 2004 20:21:40 GMT

Hey.. I know everyone probably hates me for what happened. Or someone is really angry with me, but i am really sorry. My doctor told me tat i probably do it because when i do, i dont even know. And the last straw for my body was that and she said the reason i went to my brother crying was because i knew that i needed help. I hope that everyone still loves me for who i am and is proud of me. My cousin made me feel like shit when she said to me what she said yesterday. I know you are all mad, and it doesnt justify what i did and make it ok, but it is my fault. But then its not. I needed help and what i did was a small cry and plea for it. I love all of you. And i remember a special someone telling me that they didnt want to be my friend the next time i did anything because they didnt want to feel like they did nothing for their friend. Make your choice. But just know my friends are all i got and my friends are what i need. Im doing ok tho... I feel like i have a big weight lifted off my shoulders............

I love everyone please dont forget... and my cousin i still love u with all my heart and that special someone friend of mine too!!!

P.S Comment if u like the new user pic!!!

KiNdA SaD....

Fri, 13 Feb 2004 02:58:42 GMT

Only my friends would understand what this means.... the time i got in a fight with ben and he cried... look at this song........ juss parts of it tho....

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me

I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all along

OoOoOoH So sad!

Mon, 09 Feb 2004 01:15:20 GMT

HEY...... Tomorrow is going to be a fucked day. My Uncle Wrays birthday and Ben's been dead a week. I cant believe it. I cant believe it. I cry more because its starting to kick in now. Omg.. I cant believe hes gone. My love..... My life ..........

"Long Goodnight"

every attempt to... is filled with holes it reads like a polygraph i'm told. i'm not bitter anyway. let it go. i never sleep still lest i forget
tied down by handicaps instead. i'm not bitter anyway, but i didn't want it to turn out this way. sing a long goodnight, forfit any fight. refuse to rest assured. it comes with no reply. hold on too tight, hang on every word. if it all ended tonight, you know that i wouldn't mind. it'd be back to the good old times before it won

Another Depressing Entry....

Sat, 07 Feb 2004 16:42:53 GMT

I know hes gone. And the scariest thing is that i cant change it. I usually work my way out of everything; grades, anything... Hes something that i have to cope with and i cant deal with it. If i think about it i cry. I saw a lunch ticket yesterday with the date February 2 of 2004 yesterday and i wanted to break down in tears, but i couldnt. I am tired of making my friends sad because of my problems. But he wont get out of my head. Hes stuck. I cant forget. I loved him way too much.

Thanks heather for yesterday i just needed to be in somones arms to cry and tell them how i felt. And u listened to me. I will love you forever and i will never forget how you helped me. That will go on with me forever...

I will go down.. as your lover.. your friend

Thu, 05 Feb 2004 03:09:40 GMT

hey everyone. i am getting a little better. i am better than i was before, but i still cry myself to sleep. i love all of my friends so much if they werent here i dont know what i would do.. thanks to all.. i love you with all my heart. at least im telling u guys in time thati love u ........

so lonely and sad

Wed, 04 Feb 2004 01:32:34 GMT

'cause i am due for a miracle
i'm waiting for a sign
i'll stare straight into the sun
and i won't close my eyes
'til i understand or go blind

I cant believe this happened!

Tue, 03 Feb 2004 06:40:44 GMT

I am never going to speak or love again. The one person i loved is now gone and i will never see them again. I dont htin k i hav eever been this suicidal. But to all of my friends if im not there i will always love you.. Forever and always...

Ok!

Mon, 02 Feb 2004 07:47:54 GMT

Have you ever felt liek you knew who was your next love? Like what you think is something that you want to have happen? I feel like that right now. AI feel like i cant tell the person who i know will listen to me how i feel. I wanna tell *** so bad but i just dont think that ** will understand.... I want *** to know that i care for *** without making things weird.. If you liked some person what would you do to tell them?

OoOoOoOoOoO... And also, i am going to city walk tomorrow or i am doing something else. I was supposed to go to the snow and like yeah. We arent going to get to go.. AaAaAaww! BuMMer! O well i still get to hang out with my friends! I love em. They are so pimp! Well uh lets see nothign else in my boring life except the fact that my ex is kind of bugging me. No not jason but my ex ex ben. How can you say that you would do anything to be with a person but when that person agrees with ou all of a sudden change your mind? I told ben if he still loved me that i would go out with him again.. Well w/e i am destined to be alone. OoOoOo well im used to being hurt or lonely! Its my fault anyway... right?

PrOuD!!!

Fri, 30 Jan 2004 06:18:45 GMT

Like hae you ever been in a situation where you like someone so much. And you cant tell them? I feel like that kinda... Stacy, i love you so much. I love ya like a fat kid love cake! AnyWayZ!! LoL! Uh i told jason off!! Stacy you know! And josh too! And kelly! U saw the convo!!!..."fuck you and have a nice day..." I am so proud of myself! I hate him.. Ok cuz can u say faggot! Ugh Anyways well comment away people id love ot know what you think!

LOL!!! LoVe Y'aLL

LoVe ♥,

SaMmY

ToDaY!!!

Sat, 24 Jan 2004 08:12:56 GMT

Omg today was the best and the worst day ever!!! Ok like my friends called me when i was at school and shit and they asked me if i wanted to ditch juss for 1st peiod and like go to jack in the box and then come back to school for 2nd period so we wouldnt get the call home... Well, it was me, mayra m, mayra p, amanda, linda, and rosie in the one car i drove in. Well anyways we went to linda's boyfriends house and like we chilled for a while. And then like we all got money together an dlike we went to go and find a mc. donalds. Well, we never found one and like we kept driving around and shit and like lindas boyfriend was following us and like we juss had so much fun until we got lost and she wanted him to leave. And so in order to ditch him we made a left hand turn and since there was too much traffic on our side, linda drove on the wrong side of the street!!! And then all of a sudden all of these cars came and she swerved into traffic and we almost got into an accident. Well it was cool and everything we ended up finding a del taco and like we got food and went back to that guys house. Well we ate and then we were all like lets go back to school and then no one wanted to go back so we stayed there and waited for this guys uncle to come back and he went and bought some coronas and some el presidente and stuff!!! Omg. and then since we were all juss chilling out i called my bf and i asked him if he wanted to come and shi so like we went and got him and before me and rosie and her bf left to go and get him i had a corona... and then like after, when we picked him up we went back to his house and me and jason juss talked and stuff. But like when i got there i had one more whole beer and then mayras beer she didnt finish and then the other beer from the other mayra and like then the rest of this gurl lindas b cuz the first five minutes that the beers were there, she drank 3 of em!!!! Omfg! LoL!! Well anyway back to my story, like i got drunk so fucking bad and like jason took me outside and shit and like i made out with him on the side of the house until this guy came through the fence and like he was all looking at us funny so we like walked into the house and like we sat down and shit and linda was still so drunk.. And then, omfg this guys dad came home!!! He like told us to leave but in a nice way and on the way out i fell on the front lawn and like jason walked passed me and like mayra told him to help me up and stuff and like he juss walked past me and said o well they told me to go help linda so i was like w/e and like i made myself get up off of the floor and shit. And then like i was so mad so like i sat on the curb and like he was more worried about her than he was of me.... so i got all mad and i wouldnt talk to him.. it sucked b cuz i like him and everything... Well lemme finish...... So we went to the park and like i was chilled out like i wasnt as bad and like he didnt even like talk to me at all. And then mayra told me he told her.. whats wrong with samantha? shes dumb how can u get drunk off of two beers??? And like mayra came and told me and like i got soo fucking mad b cuz what is he doing telling my friends that?? Even my best friends!!! Omg hes stupid.. well anyways. After we went to the park we went to willies house(rosies bf) and like we got linda to take a shower and stuff and like jason didnt even talk to me... He was being so stupid! So like we had to leave willies house and like willie comes up to tell me, "well he wants to go kick it with his friends and smoke weed, so imma take him home".. I was sooo pissed off, i couldnt believe him. He didnt even tell me he didntsay bye to me or anything. So, we left willies house and we went to chatsworth park and stayed there for a lil bit and like i was talking with john (lindas bf.. the guy whose house we were at in the morning). and he goes ur bf is fucked up.. and i was like why and he goes he told me some fucked up shit. i was like what tell me cuz imma break up with him anyway.. He tells me "jason said that u werent his g/f and u paid him to be here" or some shit like that.. And i was all WHAT!?!?!?! So i texted him and told him i needed help and to call me. So he called and i was like" what the fuck is ur problem!!! Why the fuck are you going to talk to my friends and tell them the shit you are telling them... Juss watch stay the fuck away from em or ill fucking kick the shit out of you jason" and i clicked..... I feel so crappy now...... Well anyway hes gay and its over..... By the way.. when school ended we went back and then me and alex walked home!!! We had the best fucking time ever!!!!!

How dexeterous am i??? LoL

Fri, 23 Jan 2004 03:17:38 GMT

I did it in 1 minute and 22</big></b> seconds.
I deserved an F--!!
Take the How Dexterous Are You? Quiz!!

Thu, 22 Jan 2004 00:47:33 GMT

ALEX!!!! Omfg i am going to kick his fucking ass so bad!! I fucking hate him so much! I wanna kill his stupid ass. I told my dad if i get suspended tomorrow u cant like be all mad at me and shit.... He said he wont. And im sorry i dont hate all mexicans.. juss him.. BUT WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT BEANOR THINK HE IS DOING!!!!! I WANNA KILL HIS STUPID GAY ASS! Omg alex im so mad!!!!! I could kill someone.. Poor chandler had to get my wrath!! I strangeled my poor lil fishy !!! LoL!!!!! (Hes only a stufffed fishy animal thingy!!!) But damn!!! I hate his stupid ass. and i could say it a million more times!

Yo Yo U yO!!!

Wed, 21 Jan 2004 06:15:42 GMT

Hey EvERYonE!!
Well today was cool. I mean it was ok! I hate that stupid fucking faggot alex. He talks so much shit. Its ok, even if i had a dick i wouldnt let her give me head.. Sorry i aint got shit agaisnt tammy but ugh!!!! Well anyway i was juss talking to josh and he said.... "Rap (retarded african poetry)"..   HOLY FRICKEN SHITE I WAS LAUGHING SOFA KING HAAAARD!!!! LOL!!! Well besides that my gramma left to go back home to vegas today.... :-(......... Well anyways.. I have nothing else to say..... Love y'all.... BuH ByEzZ!!!
                   <3
                      Sammy

BeSt WeEkEnD!!

Tue, 20 Jan 2004 07:45:10 GMT

Omg i had the best weekend in the whole entire world. I didnt do much of anything on sat but on sunday and monday... WOOOOHAH DID I HAVE FUN!!! I went to my uncle scotts house with my bestest cousin heather and saw how sad she was ski left her... I LOVE U HEATHER.... NO GUY IS WORTH UR TEARS...(well maybe not). but anyway! We had the bestest time. We took a shit load of pictures which ill put on my journal tomorrow once she sends me all of my pics.. AnyWhoo i am soo serious that we just like had the best time in the whole world! We were wiggers is what we were. Like i mean i think it shouldve been illegal to have as much fun as we did!!! LoL!!! Well like one of our pics is my new lj user pic! Well i know its juss of me but yeah!! Lol well anyways later that night we watched finding nemo ( ooo look at me imm gonna go touch the butt!!!)<----- MY FAV PART!!! lol... but like i only watched 15 minutes of it then i fell asleep! OMFG!! Lol anyway the next day was cool. We watched the end of the ring, almost all of Two Weeks Notcie and i think one other movie but i cant remember. Then wensday sprained her ankle and when they had to go and do laundry i like had to carry her on my back... HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!! She is soo heavy. Well anywayz... I love y'all! BuH ByEzZ!!!
<3
SammY

VERY PERSONAL JOURNAL

Sun, 18 Jan 2004 23:28:46 GMT

ALWAYS
I've been here before a few times
And I'm quite aware we're dying
And your hands they shake with goodbyes
And I'll take you back if you'd have me
So here I am I'm trying
So here I am are you ready

Come on let me hold you touch you feel you
Always
Kiss you taste you all night
Always

And I'll miss your laugh your smile
I'll admit I'm wrong if you'd tell me
I'm so sick of fights I hate them
Lets start this again for real

So here I am I'm trying
So here I am are you ready
So here I am I'm trying
So here I am are you ready

Come on let me hold you touch you feel you
Always
Kiss you taste you all night
Always
Touch you feel you
Always
Kiss you taste you all night
Always

I've been here before a few times
And I'm quite aware we're dying

Come on let me hold you touch you feel you
Always
Kiss you taste you all night
Always
Touch you feel you
Always
Kiss you taste you all night
Always

I wish that people didnt die. Like you think when people tell you to appreciate what you have cuz someone could die, like u dont think about it happening to you. I have a hard time coping with reality and like when someone dies in my family i cant stop thinking about it! My uncle died as everyone knows, and its like i still cant believe it. Like why cant he just get back in that body and just be normal again! Why couldnt we have just been born without hearts? I hate feeling. I feel love rarely. Bu so much depression and hatred all of the time! Why cant i stop feeling? Why do i have to be like everyone else. People strive everyday to be someone else and its like in the end im just like everyone else! I can feel and i can hear. I hurt b cuz there is no other way to feel... Is there even a such thing aas happiness?????

YAY TODAY!!!

Sun, 18 Jan 2004 08:10:48 GMT

Hey well today was awesome. Well i didnt like do much of anything. I just chilled put all day with my family and like i watched a movie called swat and like it was so0o0o good and like i just had the best time! Well like this guy Jason wanted to come over today and i was juss like no but guess what!! Travis and Andy came over with Neenee and like me and travis had like so much fun and like it was juss so awesome! we went to Carl's Jr. and like travis crashed into the door and it was so0o0 fun b cuz like this lady who works there was like what the fuck!! I was laughing so hard and then like he poured like root beer all over the back of his pants!! FUNNY AS FUCK!!! I couldnt believe he did that to himself! Well also andy dyed his hair black! Travis is cool!! HEY WHATS THE CAPITOL OF THAILAND??? BANGKOK!!!!! yayayayayay

Sat, 17 Jan 2004 15:44:14 GMT

YAY!!! My dad got home today well actually just like right now. And now we are going to dennys and like i am soo excited b cuz he brought all of this cool stuff back. He knows i love turtles so like he bought me this like pooka shell necklace with a big turtle on it!! We are about to go to dennys but i am soo excited and like i cant wait till my uncle sprig gets home!!!! I miss him too.. ByE everyone!!!

Fri, 16 Jan 2004 22:56:08 GMT

GOD!! i am so mad i was supposed to get my hair done! I have beenwaiting since november! I cant believe my aunt stevie has blown me off this long and she promised tomorrow and now she calls when im in the shower and tells my mom that i cant get my hair done!! I am so mad and like it sux! I hate my hair.. do me a favor if ur blonde and decide to die ur hair black DONT its a pain in the ass well excuse me imma go scream at someone ok bye...........

Fri, 16 Jan 2004 07:32:21 GMT

~*PeRsOnAl*~
[1.] Name: Sammy!
[2.]Sex: FeMaLe!!!
[3.]Location: City of Angels, California
[4.]Favorite part of yourself: EyEz!!
[5.]As a child, what did you want to be when you grew up? : Beautiful
[6.]Is your room messy or clean?: It’s spotless now.. i cleaned it today
[7.]Describe your wall: Posters of the used, afi, mest blink 182, good charlotte, staind, and orlando bloom..and glow in the dark stars.
[8.]Are you wearing fresh underwear or yesterday’s?: NoNe im goin commando!!

*ThE fAmOuS sUrVeY qUeStIoN*
[9.]Are you excited about taking this survey?: No

*Da HoMiEs*
[10.]Around how many friends do you have in real life?: ToO MaNy (but i love em)
[11.]Online?: Same. I keep in tpouch with people i used ot see!
[12.]Who is your bestfriend/s in real life?: Stacy and Alex
[13.]Online?: uh same!
[14.]Who do you want to be “more than friends” with?: UmMmM CaN't Say.. ShHhH alex!
[15.]Has a friend ever backstabbed you?: no not rly
[16.]Out of curiosity, what happened?: uh nothing
[17.]How many people do you have on your AIM list?: 138
[18.]YAHOO!?: 5
[19.]MSN?: uh i dont have any
[20.]Who’s the biggest pervert?: Bobby!!
[21.]Friendliest?: Stacy
[22.]bitchiest?: i dono
[24.]Shortest: Gustavo
[25.]Tallest: Mayra
[26.]huggable: Alex
[27.]loveable: STacy
[28.]Who has the most mood swings?: Me i can be happy one sec and cry the next
[29.]Which friend do you miss a lot?: Stacy i havent seen here in a while
[30.]Are your ex’s still your friends?: I wish but i cry when i see hi. ALl my friends know why (sniff sniff)
[31.]Do you consider your self to be a good friend?: Yea
[32.]Why?: My friends love me!!!! ANd i love them. Im always there for them

*RaNdOm*
[33.]Are you a virgin: Yea
[34.] Proud of it?: Yea
[35.]Do you have a cell phone?: yeah
[36.]What’s the number?: sure why not... 437-5770
[37.]can I call you?: yea anytime
[38.]What state/country do you live in?: UNITED STATES

*LiKeS aNd DiSlIkEs*
Do you like:
[39.]ice cream?: ya
[40.]boys?: LOVE EM!!!
[41.]girls?: YA!
[42.]your ex?: ya
[43.]your face?: kinda i guess
[44.]your body?: ya.
[45.]Eminem?: FUCK NO!!!!

*DeScRiBe FiVe Of YoUr (rEal LiFe)FrIeNdS StArTiNg WiTh ThE YoUnGeSt*
[46.]Alex shes nice. but makes me mad only b cuz she is my twin!
[47.]Heather... Well she is my cuz. Shes sweet but also shes juss heather
[48.]Stacy.. Well al i have to say is i love stacy. She is kind and loving
[49.]Mayra i love em both and like i couldnt live without em either!
[50.]Antonia.. i loves her alot too. Shes me and my bros friend!

*NoW Do FiVe oNlInE FrIeNdS*
[51.]all of
[52.]my
[53.]friends
[54.]are
[55.] real

*MoRe RaNdOm*
[56.]Name for a dog?: Daisy
[57.]Name for a daughter?: Jennifer
[58.]Name for a son?: Alexander
[59.] Name for a superhero?: OrGaSmOoOoOo
[60.]Name for a rapper?: retard!!
[61.] Name for a band?: Um i dono
[62.]Name for your two buttcheeks?: rocky and bullwinkle
[63.]what time is it?: 11:25
[64.]are you sleepy?: no not rly
[65.]How many times have you brushed your teeth today?: once

*SeX*
[66.]Are you a virgin?: YES!!!
[67.]if you are, answer the questions as if you werent a virgin: UuUuUummm ok
[68.]How many times have you done it?: 1,000,000
[69.]<- Have you given that a try?: ok
[70.]Name some wild positions you have done: any LoL Standard
[71.]Who was the first person you’ve done it with: UM AS I SAID IM A VIRgiN!!
[72.]Do you masturbate often?: NO!!
[73.] Have you let someone else jack you off?: .......
[74.]How often do you get a hard on?: Always!! I have a huge JOHNSON!!
[75.]Are you a porn freak?: no
[76.]Is your computer infested with porn?: no but my dads is
[77.]Have you ever made your own amateur porn video?: no
[78.]Will you do another one?/want to do one?: i guess so
[79.]Are you jacking off right now?: no im taking this stupid survey
[80.]Who is the next person you wanna fuck?: i dono anyone who loves me
[81.]You do you regret kissing?: Adam
[82.]Who do you wanna kiss AGAIN?: Ben
[83.]Who do you wanna kiss?: John Mayer
[84.]Are you a good french kisser?: Of COurse
[85.]Where did you learn?: um my hand when i was a lil gurl
[86.]And not your hand?: oops!
[87.]What is your ultimate fantasy?: Um a bunch-of-people some with John Mayer, Orlando Bloom, Benji and Joel Madden, Johnny Depp and Chris Carrabba
[88.]Would you have waited to have sex when you get married?: I would!
[89.]Do you like jacking people off?: Uh NO

*FaVoRiTeS*
What is your favorite:
[90.]ice cream?: COokie DOuGH
[91.]soda?: Diet
[92.]Candy?: Taffy
[93.]Food?: WHite ppl food!
[94.]type of dog?: Dachsunds and Golden Retrievers or Black Labs
[95.]sex?: Uh YEs PLeaSe!!
[96.]tv show?: E.R and ANGEL
[97.]Site?: dont have one
[98.]Chat room: dont have one
[99.]Band?: Lots of em
[100.]Type of man/girl: about 6 foot kinda skinny black hair some piercings nice dresser and of course LOVES ME!!

*FiNaL*
[101.]Describe the person that you got this quiz from: I got this from kathy and i miss her so much..
[102.] Okay last question. How do you feel?: Like total shit b cuz my tummy hurts

brad backwards is darb

Wed, 14 Jan 2004 06:56:05 GMT

Hey!! Omfg! You know how when a dog has to pee (a guy dog) the weiner gets bigger? Well my dog did that to my uncle allen juss now and my uncle goes " dont pull out your lipstick on me"!! Omfg i juss died laughing! It is like soo late and i am tired. I have to start to swim again tomorrow! SUX!! well im teeeeeeeerd! SO i gotta run i had a good day today tho except for the fact that this guy bobby grabbed my head and pushed it into his DiCk!!! OoOoOoOoOoOok! EeEeW!!! LoL! Well Gotta run!

Tue, 13 Jan 2004 07:19:38 GMT

Who will give you an orgasm? by leslie13
Name
Age
Virgin?
So, who will make you moan?	George Bush.
How?	Just by standing there.
Will it be good?	It's so awful, you laugh.

Created with quill18's MemeGen!

Tue, 13 Jan 2004 00:26:17 GMT

HeY ThErE!! Well Alex sEeMs to forget that jesse is mine!! But i guess she juss cant recgonize! Sorry my lil alex but not everyone is yours.. Especially my little John Mayer! Well we had fun........ So0o0o0o0o0o0o0o much fun that it should've been illegal. Well like i am sad because my cousin was shot and killed yesterday morning. I only met him a couple of times but its kind of sad.. Well we had fun.... So0o0ofa king much fun!! Larry was ovet there and i got to sleep next to him but then alex juss had to move over and stuff!(bitch).. I got so mad when she did that like omg! I wanted to sleep next to him so0o bad and then she just had to go on and mocve over so he would move!! uGh! I got mad, but im over it now..... Larry can be hers b cuz i dont want him. But at least we had fun. Well also heather is still mad at me (i think) o0o0o0o well. im tired of the drama. And if i am going to try to be a happy person i have to take all of the negativity out of it (cough). Well i haves ta go! UpDaTe LaTeRz!!! Bye!!